An act of kindness is exactly what it sounds like- something big or small you do to show kindness to someone else. I think acts of kindness are the best when they are simple and sincere. It can be something as small as a smile or a complimentary word…here are a few examples to get you going. 

Help an elderly neighbor 

If you have an elderly neighbor or friend, there are many things you can do to help them out. Sometimes what an elderly person needs the most is someone to talk to. You could offer to go to the grocery store or run another errand for them. You could take them dinner, or pack up several portions for them to keep in their freezer. If you want to bless someone, but you don’t live close to them, you can even have groceries or meals delivered to them. Many times, older people could also use some help with housekeeping, yardwork, or making phone calls. If you don’t immediately see what may be helpful, ask them, and you might be surprised by what they say.

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Pay for the next person in line

Have you ever had someone unexpectedly pay for your coffee or lunch? If you haven’t, you might be surprised just how much of an impact it can have on your whole day! Give that gift to someone you feel God leading you to. If you feel shy about it, try a drive thru…you’ll probably be gone by the time they find out! You can even have little notes ready to leave behind if you want to send a message, such as “God loves you.” or “You matter.” 

Some coffee shops allow you to add money to an account that pays for first responders’ orders or for warm drinks and food for homeless people. Ask, and if they don’t have anything set up like that, maybe you can be the first to encourage it!

If you’re more of a dine-in sort of person, enlist your server to help you covertly pay someone else’s bill and then do your best to keep on a poker face while the person you blessed tries to figure out why their bill is paid!

Bring treats for your coworkers

Treating your coworkers to things you know they love is a beautiful way to show you care. You could bring in everyone’s favorite coffee, home baked treats, lunch, or sweet handwritten notes. You might be surprised how walls start to break down when you show kindness to people, sometimes especially the ones that seem the most closed off.  If you don’t work in an office setting, you could take treats to your local firehouse or police station, or make treats for the Amazon and postal delivery people in your neighborhood.

Hopefully these ideas have got your wheels turning. There are so many ways you can use your specific gifts, talents, and passions to be a blessing to others. Think of what you already have or already know how to do to show kindness to the people in your life. Showing kindness could be the first step towards sharing your faith and telling people about the love God has for them. What random acts of kindness have you done before? 

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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“What’s on the inside of us will come out…just like a sponge when it’s squeezed. So, the question is what are we producing or focused on on the inside so something good- something godly- comes out? Check out Matthew 12.34.” –Joy

You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him.

Matthew 12.34-35

What a great representation of how our reactions are determined by our inner life: what’s in the sponge comes out when pressure is applied. You may be tempted to read this scripture and think, “I’m not storing up evil in myself!” But maybe ask yourself this instead: “Am I storing up worry? Am I storing up fear? Am I storing up unforgiveness? Am I storing up pride?” And while you’re at it: “When I’m stressed, do I react in anger? When I hear good news about someone else, do I feel envious? When I don’t get what I want, do I fly into a rage?” These things (and more) put distance between you and God, and cause you to react in ways that put distance between you and the people around you as well. Don’t get me wrong- because we’re broken people, living in a broken world, we all make mistakes. Many factors can lead to wrong reactions, but if you’re noticing a pattern of ungodly reactions, you have to look at what’s fueling them. If you’ve come across this blog and you’re not a follower of Jesus Christ, I believe you’re reading this for a reason. You can’t change your reactions (at least not for long) without letting Jesus change your heart first. 

If you are a believer already, let’s talk about some practical ways to avoid storing up evil, as well as some ways to store up good in your heart. 

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What Are You Putting In?

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.

1 Peter 5.8

The enemy of our souls is sneaky, deceptive, and manipulative. He knows you’re probably not going to be tempted to murder someone out of the blue…he’s much more subtle than that. There are many ways he can try to pull you away from God. Things that might be fine for others may cause us to walk down a dangerous path. 

• Ask God for eyes to see where you’re allowing sin in your life. Ask Him to show you where you’re getting ideas that go against Him. 
• Pay attention to your thoughts- your thoughts about God, your thoughts about others, and your thoughts about yourself. They may hold clues that you’re not filling yourself up with the good things God intends for you. 
• Evaluate your entertainment or information sources, the way you destress, the conversations you have with others…are they contributing fear? Envy? Anger? Bitterness? Ask God to help you identify and cut out things that are leading you away from Him. 

How To Store Up Good

By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. We have received all of this by coming to know him, the one who called us to himself by means of his marvelous glory and excellence.

2 Peter 1.3

God has given us everything we need to live a godly life! What excellent news! He’s not trying to hide the answers or the resources from us. And on top of that, it’s His spirit in us that gives us the strength to follow and obey Him. If you’ve been a Christian or in church for a long time, the following bullet-points may seem very obvious or too simple, but upon closer examination, you may find you’re not being as faithful in these basics as you say you are. No judgment here…it happens to everyone <3

• Study the Bible. Use a guided Bible study or read straight from the Word. There are times in your walk for both!
• Pray daily. If you struggle to stay focused, write your prayers or talk out loud. There are even apps now to support you in your prayer life.
• Praise God. Find ways every day to give praise to God. Training your brain to look for the things God is doing in your life and in the world around you changes your perception of everything. 
• Spend time with godly friends. It’s very difficult to stay faithful to God with no support. If you don’t have any godly friends, seek to connect with people at your church, through local ministries, or if necessary- on online groups. No matter how you meet people, measure their words up to Scripture and follow the Spirit’s leading before you learn from them or open your life up to them. 
• Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Philippians 4.8

May God bless you as you follow Him, and learn to fill up with all the good God has for you!

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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As we’re approaching a new year, it’s the natural time to think about ways you want to change your life. Take some time to set measurable, attainable goals in categories such as: Spiritual, Marriage, Family, Relationships, Finances, Professional Growth, Personal Growth, Career, Physical Health, Education, Travel, and Self Care. A good place to start might be: 1. Spiritual 2. Physical 3. Relationships. As the year goes on and you start meeting your goals, you can add new categories, or more involved plans, but start simple for now. 

What Will Make Your Life More Meaningful?

Start with thinking through what will make your life more meaningful and fulfilling. There are so many things we fill our time with that don’t enrich our days or help us live out our purpose. What are some things you can cut out of your schedule to make room for the things you really want to make time for? Write down your thoughts to help you keep track of your process. Doing the work to understand why you want things to be different in your life and how you’re going to accomplish them gives you something to look back at and be encouraged when you feel like giving up.

Plan to Succeed

After you’ve thought through the things you’d like to change, start a plan. One way to try is reverse engineering: you visualize the end result (in this example, what you’d like your life to look/feel like) and work backwards making smaller, bite-sized goals to move you towards your desired outcome. When you’ve figured out your first set of small goals, make sure to write them in your calendar or set alarms on your phone to help you make them a priority. Also, make appointments to revisit your goals to see how you’re doing or what might need to change to keep you on track. 

Baby Steps

Remember that changing habits is hard; have some grace with yourself. It’s easy to want to just give up when you find sticking to your plan is harder than you imagined. Don’t- get back to the plan immediately. Have you ever said to yourself, “I’ll start again Monday”? Try this instead: “I’m getting back on track right this minute.” This saves you from more guilt about going off the rails and starts to change the way you think about yourself when you make mistakes or forget about your goals. Set up ways ahead of time to reward yourself for whatever progress you’ve made, and then have plans for bigger rewards when you meet goals or make great choices. 

Ask For Help

There’s no shortage of books, blogs, apps- you name it- to help you set, track, and learn about goals. Find some resources to support you in your plans, and don’t be afraid to reach out to a friend for advice or accountability. Having support from people you love can make all the difference in meeting your goals!

What plans do you have in place to make 2022 your best year yet?

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Take a minute and think about the way you treat your friends. When a friend annoys you, are you quick to snap at her? If she forgets to do something you asked her to do, do you point it out in frustration? In my experience, it seems easier to extend grace to a friend than it does to my own husband. With a friend, I find myself thinking, “she’s probably been busy. I know she’s worried about her job and her kids…” or something along those lines. Or even, “she’s so free-spirited, she can’t be expected to remember things like that.” While it feels easy to think of our friends in compassionate, understanding, and forgiving ways, sometimes it’s harder to think of our spouse like that. Today we’re going to talk about some Scriptures and strategies to help ourselves respond to disappointments or annoyances from our spouse in more graceful and forgiving ways.

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Date Your Spouse

A great start is to begin thinking of your spouse as a friend you can still learn more about. Sometimes people call this “dating your spouse.” It can be tempting to fall into a rut in your marriage where you think you already know all there is to know about your husband or wife. That can lead to believing you know what your spouse is thinking all the time, or the reasons they are doing the things they’re doing. I can’t over-emphasize how dangerous this is. Even when you think you know why he/she is doing something, or why they said something you didn’t like, have a conversation about it. You might be surprised by what you find out. When preparing for a conversation of this type, try to approach it like you would with a friend, (trying to understand) instead of out of your own hurt feelings or disappointment. So many times we come at our spouse from our insecurities or past hurts and sabotage the communication from the beginning.

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to get angry.

James 1:19

Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding.

Proverbs 17:27

Personality Conflict?

If you haven’t already, set aside some time to do a personality evaluation with your spouse. The enemy has many tools to use against us in our marriages, it’s wise for us to use what tools we can to strengthen our relationships. It can be very helpful to understand the way your spouse sees things and processes the world around them. If you’ve done something like that in the past, revisit the results to see if there’s something that can help you communicate better, or retake the test. In many cases, our personality characteristics can change over time, and new approaches can be found to be effective in our communication. Ask your church leadership if there’s a particular test they prefer, or find one online.

Where there is strife, there is pride, but wisdom is found in those who take advice.

Proverbs 13:10

How much better to get wisdom than gold, to get insight rather than silver!

Proverbs 16:16

Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.

Proverbs 29:11

Generosity of Spirit

One of the most important characteristics to nurture in your relationships is generosity of spirit. Another way to say it- learning to give the benefit of the doubt. How many times have you gotten into an argument with your spouse over the way they said something, or a small inconvenience, only to wonder later why you let that bother you so much?

You may have heard it said that we very easily give ourselves the benefit of the doubt when it comes to our own intentions, but we assign bad intentions quickly to others. Do you ever think, She doesn’t even care about how hard I work?!  -or-  He only cares about himself! Try this little exercise. When your spouse does something that irritates or angers you, stop for a minute. Ask the Lord for help and perspective. Think about what bothered you. Let’s use a stereotypical annoyance (but one that holds true in this house!): husband has left his dirty clothes on the floor. Your first thought: I’ve asked him over and over to put his dirty clothes away. He doesn’t care about my feelings or what I have to say. Now think about ways he has shown he cares about your feelings. Keep in mind, he might not be showing you the way you want to be shown exactly, but are there ways he’s trying? One of the challenges of marriage is that men and women often look at things differently. We care about different things and communicate in unique ways. On top of that, individuals have different personalities, qualities, downfalls, and values. It’s a miracle anyone stays married at all! But seriously, melding two lives together isn’t for the faint of heart and we have an enemy who would love nothing more than to destroy marriages and families. We have to be wise and determined to build a marriage based on God’s Word and the love He has for us. Don’t allow yourself to be complacent or indifferent, preferring to believe that your marriage can’t be improved or isn’t worth the effort.

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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That’s why you and I can go to sleep tonight in peace.

T- Total 
R- Reliance
U- Under
S- Stressful 
T- Times

Are you feeling any stress? My friend, God’s got you. He is surrounding you and me with peace. Are you tired? I’ve talked to several friends, and folks are tired. I think it’s a ploy of the enemy to wear us out and to question God. So we have to remember, it’s the joy of the Lord that is our strength. If I have one word for you, it’s “rest.” Rest is a great tool to defeat the enemy. Not fear, not confusion, not stress…but rest. 

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Use these scriptures about trust, rest, and God’s goodness to encourage yourself. Read them out loud, use them in your prayers, write them down…do whatever you need to do to get the truth of God’s Word into your heart!

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.

Proverbs 3.5 NLT

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.

Philippians 4.6 NLT

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.

Philippians 4.13 NLT

God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.

Psalm 46.1 NLT

Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.

2 Corinthians 12.9 NLT

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

Romans 8.28 NLT

But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.

Jeremiah 17.7 NLT

But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you.

Psalms 56.3 NLT

We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.

1 John 4.16 NLT

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”

Psalm 91.1-2 NIV

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Matthew 11.28-29 NLT

And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 2.6-7 NIV

But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior.

Titus 3.4-6 NIV

How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God! The children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings.

Psalm 36.7 AMP

Prayer Time: 
Lord God, these are scary times we’re living in. When I feel tempted to worry or stress, help me to remember the truth of Your Word. I don’t want to lean on my own understanding, but put all my trust in You. When I start to worry, remind me to bring it to You- to lay my burdens at Your feet and rest in Your goodness and Your graciousness towards me. You are my shelter, my refuge, and my protection. Amen.

Do you have favorite scriptures to think about when you’re feeling afraid or stressed? 

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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Joy: “I had an opportunity to talk with Dr. Steve Ferrar, and ask him about distractions.”

Dr. Steve: “There’s constant information coming our way. It never ends. We’re getting pinged. We’re getting alerts. It just doesn’t stop. And once again, it’s the message of the world; it’s the perspective of the world. If I don’t have any time where I am feeding on the Scriptures before I get going in my day, meeting with people, dealing with my family- when I lose that ground, I’ve got nothing. I’ve got nothing to say. The Barna Group did a survey a couple of years ago of Christians who were committed to the Scriptures; they believe Jesus was the son of God. I mean, these are people that really take their Christianity seriously. They found out that only 17% of them have a biblical worldview. Now, how can that be? It’s because they listen more to what’s being told to them in the media and on Facebook and on social media. They get their information from (other sources) more than they do from the Scriptures. So they’re not much different than the world. We’ve got to start with the basics. When all else fails, read the directions.”

Most of us have been able to see in our own lives and in the lives of those around us that some guidelines have to be put in place to limit our screen time. If you like your phone, social media, games or videos, etc. it can be very difficult to self-regulate the amount of time you spend on these things. Spending too much time on social media can impact our relationships negatively. It can make us feel overwhelmed and resentful if we’re constantly seeing bad news or things that make us jealous. I’m certainly not the first person to point out that social media is a hotbed of comparison, and it’s never healthy to compare your everyday life to someone else’s highlights. If you’re in a place where you know you need to limit your screen time, we’re here to help. Here are 3 things you can do to get your screen time under control. (If you need help figuring out how to limit your children’s screen time, watch for the next blog post!)

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3 Ways To Take Control Of Your Screen Time

1. Use A Timer

Whether you set a kitchen timer manually, or use an app that cuts off your access to social media platforms, (or whatever app is a time-suck for you), timers are a great tool to help you be cognizant of how much time you’re spending on your phone. iPhones have a setting called “Screen Time” where you can see a breakdown of how you’re using your phone time, schedule downtime from your phone, set limits on each type of app, and more.

2. Hide Your Phone

Have you ever realized all of a sudden that you’re on Facebook even though you were only getting on your phone to check the weather? It’s crazy how fast that habit can take hold. Try hiding your phone from yourself. Put it in a drawer or somewhere out of your sight and see if it doesn’t help you find other (potentially more productive) things to do. In this same vein of thought, don’t charge your phone in your bedroom. I can hear you right now thinking, “but I use the alarm on my phone to wake up!” There are some ways around that…put your phone in the next room and put the volume on your alarm all the way up. Or, if that won’t work for you, set an alarm on an Echo or something similar. If that won’t work either, head to the closest thrift store and buy yourself a good old-fashioned alarm clock. 

3. Take Up A Hobby

Sometimes we find ourselves on our phone when we’re bored, or when we’re trying to pass time, like at the doctor’s office or waiting in line. Try keeping a book, or a crossword puzzle, or a magazine with you. For times you’ll be sitting down, you could learn to crochet, knit, make a bullet journal or sketch. Not only will you be keeping yourself from wasting time on your phone, but you’ll also learn a skill you’ll have for the rest of your life! What tricks do you use to limit your screen time?

Don’t forget to check back soon for our next blog about tips to help your kids limit their screen time too!

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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“Late at night, we might feel a ‘911’ in the spirit. That’s a nudge for you to pray, to enter into that quiet place with the Lord. Let Him bring you a word of comfort and a word of hope.”

If you walk long enough with Jesus, He’ll ask you to do something that doesn’t make sense to you, like waking up in the middle of the night to pray, saying something to a stranger, or buying the person behind you in line a coffee. In a world where logic seems to reign supreme, this can prompt the people around you (and even your own mind) to say, “that just doesn’t make sense!” Rest assured, you’re in good company. There is example after example of situations in the Bible where God asks someone to do something that doesn’t seem to make sense to our human minds, but from God’s perfect perspective, there’s always a reason! One of the reasons is usually to grow your faith and to teach you to obey. May these stories increase your faith and your trust that God knows what He’s doing, even when we can’t see the whole picture. 

Numbers 20.7-12

 “The LORD said to Moses, ‘Take the staff, and you and your brother Aaron gather the assembly together. Speak to that rock before their eyes and it will pour out its water. You will bring water out of the rock for the community so they and their livestock can drink.’ So Moses took the staff from the LORD’s presence, just as he commanded him. He and Aaron gathered the assembly together in front of the rock and Moses said to them, ‘Listen, you rebels, must we bring you water out of this rock?’

Then Moses raised his arm and struck the rock twice with his staff. Water gushed out, and the community and their livestock drank. But the LORD said to Moses and Aaron, ‘Because you did not trust in me enough to honor me as holy in the sight of the Israelites, you will not bring this community into the land I give them.’”

Numbers 20.7-12 NIV

This story is fascinating because it’s so easy to see yourself in it. It’s important to know that earlier in Moses’ life, as recorded in Exodus 17, the Lord told Moses to strike the rock in order to make water flow from it. In this situation, as recorded in Numbers, Moses is frustrated and hits the rock twice, instead of doing what the Lord told him to do, which was to speak to it. Can’t you see yourself there? Moses might have reasoned with himself, saying, “This is what I did before, and it worked.” Or, he might have just been so annoyed he wasn’t thinking about what the Lord said, he was reacting in the moment. Either way, we can see how even though the Lord’s instructions might not have made sense to them at the time (and maybe His punishment didn’t either!), but there was a reason, and God cared how it was done, not just that it was done. 

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Hebrews 11.8 

“Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going”

Hebrews 11.8 NIV

Abraham’s faith and obedience is such a great example for us today. Imagine yourself in the same situation: God tells you to move, but He doesn’t tell you where you’re going.  You might be tempted to think that doesn’t happen anymore, but it does! It doesn’t always look like moving physical locations (although sometimes it does…) Sometimes it might look like God leading you to a job change that doesn’t make sense to you, giving when you don’t have enough yourself, or a random act of kindness. And all it takes is the belief that you can trust God’s wisdom more than your own. 

Have you ever experienced a leading from the Lord that didn’t make sense to you? What did you do? What did you learn from your obedience (or disobedience)?

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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“I love hearing all about our homeschooling moms and those going back to school. So this mom, she’s got a t-shirt on, a coffee mug in her hand, and her t-shirt says, “World’s Okayest Homeschool Mom.” She’s got three boys and it looks like they are off to a good start. So shout out to all of our parents, those in school, out of school, in homeschool, doing the dual thing, a shout out to the kiddos, the parents, all of you. Just sayin, ‘Hey.’” Joy Ware Miller

This year, many families are finding themselves in circumstances they never imagined. One that might be a little unnerving is becoming a homeschooling family when that was never part of the plan. Not to worry! Today we have 3 tips to help you get the most out of your homeschool experience, whether it’s long-term or not.

3 Tips To Get The Most Out of Homeschooling

1. Be patient.

Especially if you’re a perfectionist, or used to getting things right quickly- give yourself some grace. Give your kids some grace. The word “unprecedented” is being thrown around like confetti for a reason. This is new territory for many of us and it takes time (and probably a little experimenting) to figure out a system that works for your family. Try to be ok with being the “World’s Okayest Homeschool Mom,” especially if this is not a long-term change for you. 

No matter the reason you’re in this situation, you can make the best of it and make it a good experience for your kids. 

2. Experiment.

It’s hard to think about changing up your routine if you’ve spent money or a bunch of time figuring out what to do, but if it isn’t working and you’re all miserable, it’s time to switch it up a little. Homeschool is all about being flexible and doing what’s right for your individual kids. If there’s too much to do and the kids are getting overwhelmed or frustrated, simplify your schedule to give everyone a break. If a certain curriculum or method doesn’t seem to be connecting, try something different. Remind yourself that you are not a slave to a schedule or a checklist. Don’t be afraid to make some changes, and reach out for help when you aren’t sure what to do next.

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3. Reach Out.

Community is a crucial part of homeschooling. There are regional meetings, parent groups, Facebook pages and groups, YouTube channels, blogs, podcasts, conferences, etc, to help you get connected. Just having a place you can ask questions will make you feel more confident in your homeschooling abilities. You can choose to search for other families doing the same curriculum or method as you, or families with kids the same age, or homeschoolers in your town. Sometimes sharing the responsibility of a certain class or subject can change everything. Think about if you have someone in your life who would be great at teaching or helping your children with a subject…is your spouse great at math? Do you have a grandpa who loves history? An aunt who loves to read? A fellow homeschool mom who specializes in fancy science experiments? Usually, a little creativity goes a long way in homeschooling!

No matter if you’re homeschooling for a season, or if you plan to homeschool through graduation, these 3 tips will make your life easier! Give yourself grace, stay flexible, and don’t go it alone! You’re the best person for the job. 

*Bonus Tip* (which you probably already know) Pray often! God wants you to succeed and will help you along the way

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God bless you. Stay hopeful!

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